Austin started first grade not able to read a basic sentence. He knew less than 50 sight words. It was suggested that he do another year of kindergarten, but I was (and still am) determined to get him to where he was 'supposed' to be for his age. It's hard to believe that was less than 6 months ago. I didn't realize the work that it would take for him to just be able to keep up. I didn't think about the fact that I would be working with 1st graders all day long at my job, just to come home and work with MY 1st grader for several more hours. And that is on top of cleaning, cooking, going to church, paying bills, and attempting to help Aaron with his homework. Most days I feel like a person that can't swim well that has been thrown into the deep end and is flailing around just trying to keep my head above water. It has gotten ugly at times y'all. There are MANY days that I just feel like I'm fighting a losing battle, and Austin and I are both just left frustrated and frazzled. I have cried. I have been brought to my knees. I have beat my head against the wall (not really, because OUCH!) But really, nothing is more frustrating than working with other 1st graders who seem to be 'getting it' fairly easily during the day, and then come home to my child who has to fight for every single passing grade he makes.
I remember the first year of life of each of my boys being somewhat stressful at times, but I don't remember ever feeling more overwhelmed or thinly stretched as I have over these past 6 months. Adjusting to going back to work has been a MAJOR adjustment in and of itself. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy what I am doing very much. I LOVE the kids that I get to work with everyday, and they all now have a special place in my heart. I am so thankful that I get to work at the school where my children attend. I love bumping into Austin in the hallway and getting a quick hug or fist bump, or getting a peek at Aaron on the playground during his recess. These are little things, but they are priceless to me. But after we leave school and get home, it all starts back over. I give them 30 to 45 minutes to snack and watch TV, but then it's work time. Aaron frequently has math homework (that has just about surpassed my not-so-mathematically-minded self) that I attempt to help him with. Austin has 4 to 5 tests every Friday, so we spend Monday through Thursday working on the material he will be tested over that week.
English, grammar, and spelling have always been my favorite subjects, but I haven't really thought that much about how difficult the English language is until this year. Things I've learned about our language: there is a 'rule' broken in just about every paragraph, what works for one word will not work for another word just because it's similar, and you cannot phonetically sound out words that are rule breakers.
I ran across this poem one day and it hit the nail on the head...
....which leaves me asking, WHY do we not live in Spanish or French speaking country?! Surely other languages follow the rules more closely than English does.
Despite the fact that English makes no sense, I decided to stick it out in America. Which meant that Austin needs to learn this stuff. And that I needed to get this child excited about reading before we both lost our heads. This is why I made a decision in January to focus completely on improving Austin's reading level rather than on his spelling words and math. Not that those aren't important, but being able to read trumps almost everything. After all, if you know how to spell a word but can't read it when it's in a book, then you're no better off. And you have no chance at a math word problem because it's made up of WORDS. There is no escaping them.
So I presented a challenge to Austin in late January. It was to read 200 books from that day to the end of spring break, which will be mid-March. My purpose is not to overwhelm him with books he can't read, because we've started with very basic level books But we are working our way up to more difficult books without him even realizing it. It has been a great experience for both of us so far. It has become routine for he and I to go to Books-a-million after church every Sunday morning (Well, after lunch. I mean, reading is important, but so is food.). We pick out several books and find some place to sit together and he just reads. I look forward to this time, and I think he enjoys it too. It's only been a few weeks, but I can see a big difference in just this short amount of time. He got to pick out prizes that he will get after the first 100 books, and also when he makes it to 200. We try to read one or two books a day at home during the week also.
This was the day we started...
And this is where we are today...
The words are getting easier for him, he is not having to say as many words sound by sound as he did when we first started, and we aren't even halfway to our goal yet. I expect big differences in where he is today and where he will be by the end of March. We are both working hard to keep this up, and we are both noticing the results. It's been a positive thing for us since it started, and I hope that it continues.
Now that the school year is more than half-way over with, we seem to be on a good solid track. I no longer feel like I'm flailing (I NEVER use that word, and then BAM! Twice in one post.) around gasping for air. This past week seemed to be the easiest week we've had at home since school started. I feel like my guys are stepping up and helping me around the house more now than they ever have (which is a HUGE load off). And most importantly, Austin is more secure with his reading than he ever has been, and it's only getting better. I have shared my struggles with many of my close friends throughout the past several months, and I want to tell y'all thank you so much for checking on me and praying for me during all of this. It is, by far, not over. But I am beginning to see a faint little light at the end of this very long, dark tunnel, and I am running toward it with everything I have.
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