Tuesday, November 23, 2021

To Austin, on your 16th...




Dear Austin, 

Welcome to the age of your first taste of true independence. 16 is a big deal. You'll get your license, which opens the door to so many more freedoms. You'll get your first debit card, which will teach you money management in a whole different way. You'll be presented with opportunities that you can't even foresee at this point. You'll more than likely have days where you're pretty sure you know more than dad and I. And then you'll be humbled when you realize you really do still need us. You'll start thinking more seriously about your future and where you want to be and what you want to do in the coming years. You have so many great things coming your way! 



But let's take a minute to reflect on all the things you did and learned during your 15th year of life. 


Your first big decision as a 15 year old was to drop out of band and put all of your effort into theatre. You took a chance and tried about for Puffs last fall, and ended up loving every minute you got to spend with your theatre family. While I hated to see you leave something you were so talented in, I understood and respected your decision to get out of band. That just goes to show you that God often has different plans that we have for ourselves, but those plans are often far better than anything we could have imagined. You will find this is true throughout your entire life. 


While you're much more comfortable on the tech side of theatre, I'm so proud of you for stepping up and acting, when needed. Your flexibility opens the door for so many opportunities and allows you to participate in every area of theatre. The friendships you have made and continue to make will help shape who you are and who you will become, and it's been so fun to get to know so many of your friends. 




This year has been an adjustment from driving you everywhere myself to letting you drive much of the time and also letting you ride with friends, since many of your friends are driving now. You have no idea how many prayers have been said on your behalf every time you get behind the wheel and every time you get into a vehicle with a friend. And I know that those prayers will increase 10-fold during this next year when I will no longer be in the vehicle with you to put on my own imaginary brake, tell you to slow down, or say "that's you" when you need to just gas it and go. 


You wanted a new computer this year, but instead of letting me get you a new laptop, you ordered all the parts you needed and together with your friend Brett (and a little help from his dad), you proceeded to build your own for 1/2 the cost of a new one. I still don't understand how someone even knows how to do that, but you love your computer and use it daily. I'm not sure I ever even told you this, but I am so proud of this accomplishment and I just think it's the coolest thing. 









Over the summer (even though you hesitated every time Uncle Johnny asked), you agreed to work at church camp as a counselor for the little kids, and you absolutely rocked that role. I received many texts throughout the week from people that were there with you letting me know how good of a job you were doing. You didn't want to do it because you said you didn't know what to do with kids, but you showed (and learned for yourself) that you are a natural with them. When dad and I picked you up on Friday, the kids were sad to leave you. That's a sign of a great counselor! I'm so proud of you for stepping out of your comfort zone and just doing it!






Words of advice for your 16th year:

You've never been one to feel as if you needed a girlfriend to be complete, and that's one of the many things I love about you. My advice on dating in high school is to not tie yourself to one person too early. It's completely ok to take a girl out to dinner and not end up boyfriend/girlfriend by the end of the night. You are still learning who you are, so there's no way that you should already know exactly what you're  looking for in a girlfriend at this point. Most people don't find their spouses in high school anyway, so use this time as a learning opportunity to discover what types of girls you enjoy hanging out with and what you want and don't want in a girlfriend. 



Don't ever feel like you have to act a certain way or participate in certain things to be loved or accepted. The right people will love and respect you for your differences. 


Realize that grades aren't everything, but they are still important. Once you make the grades, your permanent records can not be changed. Learn to use your time wisely now, and it'll be easier for you in college. If you have an assignment due in 2 weeks, begin it when you find out about it. If you've got something that you're given a specific time to memorize lots of information (umm, hello polyatomic ions), begin it NOW! Putting things off until the last minute just makes it harder on yourself later on.


As you begin exploring your new-found independence that comes with having a license, please remember that you're going to want to do things and go places that we may not approve of. Even when you don't understand our reasoning, all we ask is that you respect and trust us enough to know that we can see potential dangers in things that you may not be able to see. We have spent the past 15 years making sure that you are safe, and we're not about to stop now. And I promise it's because we love you, not because we hate you and wish a miserable life on you. And the argument "everyone else is doing it" won't work, and may very well be the reason you don't get to do it. 
Continue to shine God's light in every aspect of your life. Don't ever be afraid to make the right choice, even if you're made fun of for it. And if you are made fun of for it, those aren't your people. I can tell you with almost 100% certainty that this year you will have opportunities to drink, vape, cheat, go too far with a girl, cuss, ALL THE THINGS, so go ahead and prepare yourself with how you will handle these situations. Participating in these things as a teenager are a pretty fast way to screw up your own life. No one gets to decide things for you but YOU! I would encourage you to add Casting Crowns song, Slow Fade on your regular playlist to be reminded that that is how Satan works. Be careful little eyes what you see. Be careful little feet where you go. Be careful little ears what you hear. Issues that you now see as black and white, wrong or right, can easily turn gray and a feeling of "maybe it's not THAT bad"... Set boundaries for yourself in all areas and don't cross them. Think of them as guardrails on the side of bridges. You may hit the guardrails every once in a while, but having them there will keep you from falling off the path. Dad and I won't be there to make these choices for you. This is YOUR faith, not ours. God is good and He has got you. 



Continue to be confident in who you are. Laugh at and learn from your mistakes. You're not perfect and never will be, but how you react to mess-ups helps build character and molds you even more into who you are becoming. Don't be afraid to step up and be a leader when no one else does. I have seen a natural ability in you for this, and I pray you never lose the confidence to do this. You don't have to be perfect or even great at something to lead, you just have to step up and work through it with the help of others. 

It has been an honor to get to be your mom for 15 years now, and I couldn't be more excited about your future. You are going to do big things, I just know it! 16 can be a fun, but tough year. Dad and I are your biggest fans. Put God first, spend more time reading the Bible than on Snapchat, pray (a lot), seek wisdom from others that have been there, and know that most things that happen in high school that you may think are just horrible won't even matter to you by the same time next year. I'm so very proud of you. Oh, I almost forgot... make smart choices. :)


I love you,

Mom